Actual Classified Ads

Jon

New Member
The following were actually taken from recent classified ads in newspapers:

FREE PUPPIES:
1/2 COCKER SPANIEL -
1/2 SNEAKY NEIGHBOR'S DOG
-----------------------------------------
FREE YORKSHIRE TERRIER.
8 YEARS OLD. UNPLEASANT LITTLE DOG.
-----------------------------------------
1 MAN, 7 WOMAN HOT TUB -- $850/offer
-----------------------------------------
AMANA WASHER $100.
OWNED BY CLEAN BACHELOR WHO SELDOM WASHED.
-----------------------------------------
SNOW BLOWER FOR SALE...
ONLY USED ON SNOWY DAYS.
-----------------------------------------
FREE PUPPIES...PART GERMAN SHEPHERD - PART STUPID DOG
-----------------------------------------
2 WIRE MESH BUTCHERING GLOVES:
One 5-finger, One 3-finger, PAIR: $15
-----------------------------------------
COWS, CALVES NEVER BRED...
ALSO 1 GAY BULL FOR SALE.
-----------------------------------------
83 TOYOTA HUNCHBACK -- $2000
-----------------------------------------
SOFT and GENITAL BATH TISSUES OR FACIAL TISSUE
89 cents
-----------------------------------------
NORDIC TRACK $300
HARDLY USED ***************
CALL CHUBBIE ***************
--------------------------------------
BILL'S SEPTIC CLEANING
"WE HAUL AMERICAN MADE PRODUCTS"
-----------------------------------------
FOUND: DIRTY WHITE DOG.
LOOKS LIKE A RAT...
BEEN OUT A WHILE..
BETTER BE REWARD.
-----------------------------------------
HUMMELS - LARGEST SELECTION EVER
"IF IT'S IN STOCK, WE HAVE IT!"
-----------------------------------------
GEORGIA PEACHES
CALIFORNIA GROWN -
89 cents lb.
-----------------------------------------
NICE PARACHUTE:
NEVER OPENED - USED ONCE
SLIGHTLY STAINED
-----------------------------------------
TIRED OF WORKING FOR ONLY $9.75 PER HOUR?
WE OFFER PROFIT SHARING AND FLEXIBLE HOURS.
STARTING PAY: $7 - $9 PER HOUR.
-----------------------------------------
JOINING NUDIST COLONY!
MUST SELL WASHER and DRYER $300.
-----------------------------------------
LAWYER SAYS CLIENT IS NOT THAT GUILTY.
-----------------------------------------
ALZHEIMER'S CENTER PREPARES
FOR AN AFFAIR TO REMEMBER
-----------------------------------------
GAS CLOUD CLEARS OUT TACO BELL.
-----------------------------------------
OPEN HOUSE
BODY SHAPERS TONING SALON
FREE COFFEE and DONUTS
-----------------------------------------
KELLOGG'S POT TARTS - $1.99 box
-----------------------------------------
FULLY COOKED BONELESS SMOKED MAN - $2.09 lb.
-----------------------------------------
FOR SALE BY OWNER
Complete set of Encyclopedia Britannica. 45 volumes.
Excellent condition. $1,000.00 or best offer. No longer
needed. Got married last weekend. Wife knows everything.


------------------
Jon Fleischer
Oasis Pressure Cleaning
(909) 792-2247
Fax (909) 792-5633
 

Our Sponsors

Top